April Gutierrez

Darkest Before The Dawn

2012-01-14T06:15:00.000-08:00

It’s true, that saying which says it is always Darkest before the Dawn. The trial and tribulations we face in life lead us to this very statement. When the mountain seems to crumble before us, we become blinded by our fears. It is then that we are blindsided by anger, resentment, and disappointment. What then do we do in this precise moment of Dark? We dig deep for the strength within, that confidence in our soul that screams at us, telling us we can accomplish anything. –What do you mean you don’t hear it….Of course you can’t, you have to have faith that it is there and just keep digging, keep doing, keep trying. The moment you quit, you fail. It’s as simple as that. The moment you allow yourself to say, “This is Impossible” you have let your fear win and you are a failure. What do you mean that’s Harsh – No, it’s reality. The moment you quit trying to achieve something, you have failed at doing.

I’m not saying this for a motivational purpose; I am merely repeating what I have been taught. You ask me, on any day of the week, “How did you do that?” and I will tell you, I found a way. I gave up my ideal on what I wanted…not giving up on achieving them, just on how to attain them. I decided to go for one thing at a time, Busting my ass at each and every dream at that moment. Have I gotten Everything I Ever wanted? –The answer is simple, No, but then again, I can compromise the when and more importantly the How.

Compromise…The MOST important word in getting out of the Dark. I made a list about 5 years ago, or more like a dream board, hung it next to my desk and kept thumb tacking dreams to it. In that time, I have taken pictures and notes down, not just because I have achieved the dream but because I compromised their importance. Do you really NEED certain dreams; are they for the greater good? Can you have something in a smaller scale, or is it a MUST that you have it be so Grand. I laugh at this part because most of us would put Mansion, million dollars, etc. etc. Well…think about it, do you really Really want a mansion to have to clean all the time? Would you want to pay the enormous taxes on being a millionaire…could you compromise and have something in the middle, for example: your house being paid off…or having money in a savings account and being able to pay your bills and not be in the red once you’re done.

The only reason I’m even writing this is because I found a new sense of happiness when I finally learned the importance of Looking at the Bigger Picture. It’s not the most important thing for me to have one of my books on the New York Times best-seller list. I mean, it would be nice but the just the fact that my books are being published is what I find as the accomplishment. Bigger Picture: I’ve always wanted a vineyard, but I don’t Need all the land to know I can grow grapes and make wine…I have 7 vines growing and producing European grapes and they are still alive. I’ve succeeded to overcome my black-thumb. POINT: I’m happy with the small achievements which keeps me in the light.

I suppose we must learn to be truly happy with all the small things before we can make it past the dawn.

-April Gutierrez

1/14/2011

Saying Goodbye to 2011

2012-01-01T15:29:00.001-08:00

2011 will go down as my pause year. As insane as that sounds considering how loud the first part of the year was for me, it seems that I got stuck in a rut and gave up on everything. I let my fears take over and let everything just Stop. Upon waking up this morning, I let the newness consume every thought, every idea and I’ve made up my mind….Fear will not ruin me. I know my limitations now, I accept what has been and what will never be, but I’m still going to dream. I have always, and will always be a dreamer. The flip side to having dreams is actually accomplishing them...the single moment which is given upon attaining such things is short and bittersweet. Who wouldn’t want more? I am raising 3 impressionable children and can’t imagine them going their whole life without dreaming something outlandish. Health or no health, some things only burn out the light of our existence. The biggest lesson that 2011 left me was about control. We don’t have any control over anything other than ourselves. Our actions are reactions to others actions and we don’t have any power over those. The grander scheme of things boils down to the fact that we have to roll with the punches and make the best out of the life we are given. Mistakes are made, decisions are set before us, and all we can do is accept what is. I am thankful for those who have stuck beside me, through all the tough patches because those are the moments that define us. A friend told me recently that I’m not dying which means anything is possible, so no matter what 2012 brings any of us, my actions and choices will change. Because I may not be able to control others or what they do, or don’t do, but I Sure as Hell can do my very best to be the girl I was meant to be. Outlandish dreams and all!

~A.Gutierrez 1/2012~

What it truly means?!?!

2011-12-14T18:01:00.000-08:00

Since the week before Thanksgiving I've been struggling with 'What is Right', 'What is Complex', and 'What I Want'. The want is actually simple...I merely want to make it to Christmas Day without having to go into the hospital. The complex falls into the juggling my schedule and responsibilities, which I have not lessened since my last visit to the doctors. But the last of the three is the shadiest, the 'What is Right'. You see, this simple 3 word statement falls into the heated arguments of my soul. This has been the greatest of all three struggles and I'm on my last leg of not fully understanding it, so my literal explanation will help me clear that up.

It is not my place to say what is right for any person other than myself. I know this. My mind, honestly, Knows this. But my HEART, well, My heart has another tale to tell. It doesn't really tell either, it Yells, Screams, and pleas with all the obstacles that cause it pain. Exasperated with all the family crap the holidays bring, I just have to say: sit down and THINK!

A little melodramatic? well, just a little I suppose, but if you could only see the tears my heart bleeds from it all. Because It is Right to be with your family. It is right to pick up the phone and suck up your pride for one God Damn Time in your life...especially during the holidays. It is RIGHT to acknowledge when you have done something wrong, been stubborn, Ignorant, and even Childish. It is right to look at the bigger picture and For Once in your entire existence realize that you are not the only one in a huge group of people with troubles and let downs. It is right to FORGIVE when someone repents their mistakes, and acknowledges when they've done something wrong...and More so, to actually Admit to making a mistake. It is Right to be the Bigger person and compromise when a solution can't be made.

Absence does Not make the heart grow fonder...it leaves the remains of a tainted bruise which will linger a hurt every minute of everyday. And I'm not talking about one of those aches that come and goes. No, it's the kind that follows you everywhere. The kind that smacks you at just the right moment when something triggers a tender memory. Those memories we hold most treasured in our hearts. And then what...It is Right to forgo pride to let forgiveness heal the broken relationship.

Yeah, I would say that the 'What is Right' has been what is keeping me off track and out of the Full Christmas Spirit this year. Here, I am planning everything from car rides to see twinkle-lights, the fun parties, the caroling, tree decorating and warm nights by the fire. All the while waiting for others to do the Right thing.

Waiting leads to disappointment because it is an expectation that the other person will actually meet you half way...and in some cases, even a miracle won't make a mountain move. The lesson 2011 has taught me is that Expectations are nice to have on paper, or in a mental notepad but in reality...you will never be Let Down by anyone if you don't expect anything from them. Cynical? No- not at all....Realistic.

So it all comes down to this: I end up asking myself...What does it truly mean??

And my answer is Simple - On Christmas Eve, the holiest child was born, to a world filled with people not knowing 'What is Right'. I know what is Right, because I have not lost track of my faith. I am not Lost because I have treasured Love and Peace from Believing. Christmas isn't about monetary items...It's about Faith, Family, and Friends.

Winter is Weeping!

2011-09-11T16:14:00.000-07:00

Winter is weeping
for we have forgotten
its elegance and wonder.

It cries to recall
the stillness of morning,
when the wind has abandoned
its nightly game.

It begs to be forgiven
for the chill
which engulfs the soul in torment,
it means only to keep us company.

Winter is weeping
these long summer nights,
it watches us dance and sing
in the warmth of darkness.

It longs for our innocent smile
while it sheds its first snow,
the one most anticipated of all.

It urges us to make way
for that which is almost always forgotten,
for with all its beauty,
its pain is devastating to all.

Winter is weeping.

`April Dawn Gutierrez 2011`

Chance ....is there anything else?

2011-08-02T08:10:00.000-07:00

So last week I found myself driving around the city, not really wanting to get back to reality. I just wasn't ready to face my life. In that childless car I could actually hear myself think...something I hadn't carefully done in quite some time. And in that thinking, I passed a landmark, a place which in a distant past had virtually changed everything in my life, took me down a unexpected path.

So the question came. then ...as I turned the corner and carefully glanced back one last time to make sure it wasn't just my mind playing tricks...Was it Chance, or Fate? That particular question opened a Lot of doors in what my mind was ready to accept as an answer, that universal question... Is everything we do predestined, as if it was created for us alone to experience in a unique way. Is why we are here for one specific purpose? Or is everything we do, every choice we make, the path we end up taking just... Chance?

I had to ask the question to another thought provoker and the answer was satisfying enough...but ultimately selfish. Chance is scientific...Fate and Destiny fall in the romanticism part of us being human. The egotistical belief that we are here, part of the universe because it was made 'For Us' and not because we are apart of something altogether unexplainable.

I choose to Selfishly believe that we are apart of something as opposed to the alternative. Why? because it means I am relieved of having to be here for a purpose...to influence someone, to complete a pre-destined path so that a greater good can be accomplished. The weight of such a belief is ENORMOUS! believe me. Once you accept that things could be different and put your mind into thinking that scientifically everything is just up to Chance, Wow! Its incredible the type of smile that will cross your face.

That 'what could have been', and 'could still be' fall on your own choices. You can choose to take an action and believe that if chance is with you, then it is meant to be. Live your life, knowing that every choice you make takes you down a different road. Good, Bad, it doesn't really matter, because either way it is Your choice, not some pre-destined idea that things are meant to happen a certain way because someone, some Greater being has fated us that way.

I suppose that this is one of my more Bologna filled blogs because some things are easier said than done, and lets face it, I have more romanticism ideals than anyone I know, so my analytical brain will only last so long. Eventually I will start writing about a character who has these same thoughts and ends up leaning towards the fate and destiny line of belief. HA!

My Opinion about Education in America in 2011

2011-07-30T04:30:00.000-07:00

Common sense has become a vacant asset in politics for quite some time. I appreciate that I am not a politician but when it comes to the basics, I learned a few things along the way. ‘Take care of the bottom or your house of cards will eventually collapse. Educate the future thinkers of our nation and we will continue to be the power house of the globe’. The common sense in that statement has obviously eluded our government.

Actions speak louder than Words. So while I sit here and write a blog of my thoughts and observations, these words pale in comparison to the Actions great leaders of our beloved country are taking.

Education is the ‘Red-Headed Stepchild’ of Employments in the United States of America. On January 25th, 2011 our standing President, Barak Obama, took the pedestal for his State of the Union address and firmly spoke to the youth of our country, stating “To every young person listening tonight who’s contemplating their career choice: If you want to make a difference in the life of our nation, if you want to make a difference in the life of a child – become a teacher. Your country needs you.”

It was Incredible that night, sitting there while my children were just falling asleep, to hear a leader urging the youth of his country to spend tens of thousands of dollars on a higher education; specifically when his government, states and federal, are cutting budgets to the point of bleeding the educational system. First year teachers are getting laid off before they can even start working for the coming school year. Those newly graduating college students, having earned a Bachelor’s degree to be someone who ‘Makes a Difference’, have no job prospects available because the politicians under his command feel education is not important enough to fit ‘into’ the budget. Or make the necessary compromises to keep teachers employed.

Again, I will state, Actions speak louder than words.

The people in a democratic nation are given the right to decide who will represent our voice. Yes, as insane as that sounds, we are the cause of our own grief. We place faith in the hands of individuals who have perfected the art of manipulation and deceit. We respect them until the moment the other shoe drops and we are faced with having nothing to show for it. Oh, Wait, we do have something to show for it: Debt, Loss, War, and Disgrace, and a nation whose unemployment rate is at an all time high of 9.1%. For those of you who like to see actual numbers: that is roughly 27,937,596 United States Citizens unemployed at the moment. Thousands of those now standing in the Unemployment line are educators who at one time or another taught the minds of our future generations. I get chills thinking about a future society that lacks a stable education because our current Political representatives can’t see the importance of nurturing the minds of our youth.

The United States has become the laughing stock of the planet and our leaders are more concerned with pointing the finger, stating the need to create accountability instead of taking the Common Sense route and finding solutions. Fine, I agree with accountability but not for it to be the end-all to the system. Common sense leads the way to the ‘shades of gray’ in education. One of the primary things we learn in becoming educators is that Education itself is filled with infamous 'shades of gray'. The children we are molding to be our future, they are the thumbprint of difference. No two ever the same, similar-yes, but never the same. The system itself should not be held to a black and white complex. It proves only that we are building ourselves to eventually become enclosed with road-blocks.

If we are ever to become similar to those countries that the president spoke of, in his address back in January, with admiration and I dare say Envy, whose educated youth are far more advance than that of our nation, I’d say his Political leaders are going about his vision for change in the wrong way.

The statement ‘We the people’, has become, ‘We the abandoned and betrayed’. The life we live in the 21st century becoming more of a flash back to a movie where Rome is the center of attention. We have not Leaders, we have senators and a republic looking to fill its pockets with the treasures earned from the sweat of the suffering. The empty promised of a better future, of a Change which will bring us Out of Depression, only turning our hopes into oppression. It wouldn’t be so detrimental to the foundation of our lives if we were as ignorant as they wished us to be.

We have raised the greatest minds of our time and yet they, the government, thinks us to lack a Chess-Form way of looking at our future. Every choice made today effects tomorrow.

Birthday Thoughts

2011-07-28T14:49:00.000-07:00

I thought of writing this blog last night in the mist of an aggravated Insomnia...I say aggravated because my mind apparently is at war with the Ambien-Benedryl combination I've been taking this past week :) Birthdays usually push me into a whirlwind of memories...so I suppose it's better that I'm writing this blog in the middle of a busy day then last night when my mind was reliving all Kinds of crazy things. Years of compounded memories flooding the mind all at once is not always a great thing. I am now free of foot-in-mouth moments I suppose!

Anyhow~ The celebration of one's birth should be a wondrous thing. The awe-inspiring idea that our mortal existence could at any second be taken away from us becomes a moment of cheer that we have achieved one more year of life. Hooray, I am closer to that moment. [Pause] ... sigh and chuckle at the thought.

So what are my thoughts?? Well...they are more like wishes. Which is why I've decided on baking 31 cupcakes...each with it's own candle for a wish. Sound silly? Nah...I have lots to wish for this year. And as silly as most would think it would be for a grown woman to put 31 candles on 31 separate cupcakes....well...I suppose you would just have to Really know me and....And, you would have to know my humorous way of coping.

Bear with me ;) Wishes are for children who tightly shut their eyes and pray that somewhere in that pile of perfectly wrapped gifts is that One special item they jumped up and down for in the store while begging mommy and daddy, all the while assuring them that they would do their chores. {Smiles} I know, I've got 3 kids, and I can remember doing that to my mom. And yes, I agree to some degree that blowing out candles as an adult is just vaguely silly. But mostly that is because as an adult we lose that magic of moments like birthdays, and Holidays...where gifts are not carefully chosen by loved ones...they appear~virtually out of No Where. ~Shrugs Shoulders~ what can I say...I'm living because of that Magic of those moment. Wishes are like prayers....but as a child we just don't realize it that way. Miracles are magical...and explanations are not really needed.

That first candle I blow out tonight in front of my family... that first wish that I will make with tightly shut eyes.........That I will have another birthday to celebrate next year......the second wish ~ that I will have a birthday the year after that...So On and So Forth. I think you get the point. I just want more time. That's It! HA!

So my birthday thoughts this year all boil down to what is. All the thinking, All the ghosts of things un-lived and everything else that just isn't part of Life......~sigh~ they just don't cut it this year. And honestly after everything I've learned in the past 7 months, I doubt that weightless wishes will ever cause me to shut my eyes and pray. The beauty of happiness is that its Free.

Unfortunately it is also Bittersweet.

-April D. Gutierrez

The Selfish person I am!

2011-04-25T15:31:00.000-07:00

The Selfish Person I am!

Looking back through my entire life, I can see why those loud voices preach my selfish ways. And now, sitting alone when I can gather my thoughts without interruption I find one argument nagging ever so painfully.

I shouldn’t have to excuse myself; I shouldn’t even have to explain…I was raised with a strong personality and precise conviction. And though I shouldn’t have to say anything, I will say plenty. I’ve learned along the way that no one can take away your morality unless you’ve given them the right to. No one can take away your happiness unless you allow them to do so. No one can push you to have a swayed opinion unless you choose to bend to your beliefs.

I’m so selfish that at an early age I was made to chose a path which tore my soul apart..and did so, baring the consequences on my own shoulders alone. I’m so selfish that I decided to end a loveless marriage so that love could truly be found. I am so selfish that I accepted who I am as a whole person and found forgiveness to be a gift and not a choice.

I am so selfish that I have always compromised thinking that others, older and deemed wiser would be mature in their actions. I am so selfish that when asked what I want…my reply is usually one to benefit others.

Now let me explain the one nagging argument that none really take into account. The last week of Dec 2010 I almost DIED. I left the hospital with hope…but also with warning. Warning that the war with my body is not over, and that going forward will be like walking on eggshells, the time on the clock ticking away with answers far and few in between.

I get that no one knows exactly how their life will turn out, but you tell ME if I don’t have the right to be just a little Fucking selfish knowing that I could die at any moment.

I am so sick and tired of hearing that I am selfish, more so by people who lack the knowledge of what it’s like living a day in my shoes. You wake up every god damn day with a headache that debilitates you, and rely on medicine to function normally. You tell me after years of that how you relate to people in general. You tell me what its like to bust your ass to accomplish life goals as if everything was perfect…and still accomplish them without giving up. You tell me what its like to be a parent to 3 small children and still make them breakfast, lunch and dinner, bathe them, do homework with them, and still read a book to them at bedtime. You tell me…With all of that, how you still can be a good partner to your husband or wife...and I’m not talking about just the relations part...I’m referring to how you can still be compassionate and loving to them.

You tell me! Please how all of this makes me a selfish person. It’s simple…Your opinion is based on the fact that I don’t agree with you…You know how many Opinions I don’t agree with?

MANY!!! A LOT more that you can imagine. But you don’t see me making you feel like shit about it. I don’t point the finger because there are plenty to get pointed back. I’m not perfect! I never said I was. But when I hear someone saying loud and clear to me that I am Selfish…My reply is Simple…

Yes the fuck I am! And I have every right to be at this point in my life. I have an expiration date stamped on my brain…and if that means I’m selfish with my actions then so be it. I refuse to apologize for living the remainder of my life the way I chose to live.

If you want to exclude yourself because you don’t agree, well, I’m sorry for you because I learned a long time ago that no matter what I’m the idiot that learned the true lesson of forgiveness…which means eventually I will forgive the ridiculous comments, lashings, and vile opinions because that is who I am…the selfish one!

Changes

2011-03-28T18:37:00.000-07:00

Wise words are often seen as phrases for temporary reflection. We are given short spouts of advice that help us through temporary rifts. When eventually we surpass those troubled moments, the words are often forgotten. We only recall the emotions of revelation, sense of relief that the light finally came on, then later the serenity of the calm that follows.

Our lives are filled with plenty of storms, the floods drown us with sorrows. Those erratic moments of turbulent uncertainty tend to end with us a plain of newness. Where once there was darkness, a clear light replaces our troubles.

Where does all this prolific talk come from? Recently I was faced with what most authors consider the darkest moments in their literary career. The “Writers Block” from hell was instilled in my creative force. Funny how I thought of it for so long as being much like what a golfer goes through when he gets the “shanks” … The mental game being infiltrated by an evil that changes everything. The only things that can rejuvenate the momentary loss of concentration is to dig deep and find the root of the dilemma.

So what’s my problem??? Well… I was rattled to the core and left with only life to contemplate.

Before this past December I was at the cusp of having all my goals accomplished, the college degree, the book publishing, even a love which woke my heart from a deep and dormant period. Everything was at its boiling point. And then the other shoe dropped. And it slammed so hard that it left a deep crater. The overall impact changing the future of what was once my little world.

I was diagnosed with a rare condition which almost killed me. Instead of instant death, I given a miracle of a second chance, one that offers me a little more time on this place we call Home.

So what does all this have to do with my writers block? …. Everything! Besides the fact that it took me a while to get back to my laptop, now I sit listening more to the music which once inspired the stories in my heart then to the movement my fingers would have to create. Now, I sit outside more to feel the icy cold of the North or the warmth of the Spring on my cheeks, those simple sensations keeping me alive. Now my heart is filled with anger, regret and hurt, knowing first hand that tomorrow is Not promised, and every moment we have is all I have to give. Nothing is replaceable, least of all time. So while once I was comfortable with stealing moments from my life to write to calm my soul, now its one moment less my children have with their mother. And being that Every choice I have ever made, was made because of the impact it has on my children’s future, I’m weighing more towards the fact that they deserve me more.

Someone recently expressed that we all go through seasons in life and that maybe having finished four novel was all I was meant to accomplish. And sitting here now I see the point. The peace of laying under a cloudless sky, with the crisp green grass beneath my body and the warmth of the sun on my cheeks is worth more than any monetary value a story would bring me. The smiles and squeals of joy which erupt from my daughter as I chase her on the shoreline at a gorgeous white sanded beach, is priceless, irreplaceable.

A soul could live an entire life knowing heartache and struggles because peace is never truly known. That same soul would die wishing for the peace they longed for, but how would they know of peace in death if they never experienced it in life. The moment I decided that I would Live as best I could, I struggled with what I wanted out of the rest of my life.

2011 became a clean slate for me. A new lease on life. The past is left where it is. Nothing mattering more than the present moments. I won’t lie though, the moment that gentle breeze begins to blow, I feel an overwhelming eagerness to express the most beautiful of story to anyone who will read it. So here I am, with my laptop on my legs, my children fast asleep and I have opted Not to sleep soundly…I will (Try) to give you my best Post Surgery Novel.

And this time, I won’t be writing because someone said I couldn’t do it….~Smiles~…I will write because he had faith that I could.

April Dawn Gutierrez

What would you do?

2011-02-10T20:32:00.000-08:00

What would you do if you knew that the clock was ticking, your time soon to end? Would you find that long lost love and tell them you never forgot them? And in their presence, would it matter anymore all those wasted years of secretly pining away for them, pointlessly?

Would you confess the secrets you’re most ashamed of? Those that would ripple pain to others long after you have quit breathing. Does a spotless soul really matter at the end of your life if the cost is the death of hope in others that are left behind?

Would you wake up before the sun rose that day to see the sun make it’s final entrance in your existence? Would you sit on the shore to watch the golden hue of light fill the land? Could you sit there, and let the heat of life fill your soul without moving, accepting your fate? And when the light retreated into the horizon, would you shed a tear for what you’d lost?

What would you do if tomorrow never came for you? Would you write letters to all who you were leaving behind, telling them all the things you never said? Everything you were too afraid to admit. Wouldn’t the weaknesses now seem silly? Would you record a video for your children so that they could remember your voice, or how your smile really looked when you laughed. Or when you cried. Would it be enough?

The reminder that life is limited is never more real then when you are told yours is over. You live every breath in pain. You love more deeply, and hurt more profoundly. Nothing seeming fair, never mind finding the rationality behind your fate. The lesson is for others to learn. Yours is only to say goodbye.

What would you do if your miracle turned into a curse? They show you that no matter what, you have no time left? Would you ask for forgiveness, beg for that one love you want most? Would you give forgiveness, even if yesterday you swore you wouldn’t?

Would you fly a thousand miles and knock on their door and show them that the love never fizzled out? Spend those last moments of your life in arms of the only one person who could wake the sleeping giant. Or would you die letting them believe that it is better to have loved and lost then to have never loved at all.

What would you do? ~April D. Gutierrez~

Getting back to Normal

2011-01-22T13:07:00.000-08:00

It's been a very long time since I have written in this particular blog. Mostly because I post on my Facebook fanpage when news pops up. 2011 is turning out to be an accomplishment year. After 5 long years of college I have achieved my Bachelors in Arts for Elementary Education. It was a long, Long road and I am happy I accomplished that goal.
Another major accomplishment comes in the form of business. 'Mark of the Manticore' is set to be published early this year. JimSam Inc. currently has opened a pre-sale and we are looking for more editorial reviews for the novel. Overall the excitement is at an all time high for this novel to come out. Since editing was complete we have received raving reviews.
Now that college is done, I am working on more writing and having personal serenity. Right before the end of 2010 I ended up in the hospital for a week. A long and painful week of not knowing if I was going to survive. Final diagnosis was that I had a baseball size aneurysm in my neck that Had to be taken out ASAP. And what do you know, I woke up in the ICU after that intense surgery feeling like I had been saved by an Angel. My new lease on life meant giving up on certain things, certain people, but overall if it is meant to be, then we will see each other one day.
Now I am focusing on moving forward and taking Patience by the horns and Holding On.

'Mark of the Manticore' Pre-SALE NOW!!!!!!!

2010-11-08T15:11:00.000-08:00

JimSam Inc. has Officially Launched the pre-publication sale for Mark of the Manticore. To order your copy click on the link below and visit the publisher's Bookstore. Mark of the Manticore is at the bottom of the Bookstore.

http:www.jimsaminc.com

More News to come soon regarding book tour stops, dates, and contests!!!

IMPORTANT!!!!!!!!!! If you are in the Tampa Bay area and wish to opt out of paying shipping and handling while ordering your book: Before you make your purchase email: mfreespirit@jimsaminc.com and let them know that you want to order Mark of the Manticore and pick up at the TBA BOOK LAUNCH EVENT.

Pre-Publication Sale will conclude once 200 books have been pre-sold. ETA: 11/16/2010

2010-10-16T06:30:00.000-07:00

My publisher is making room for "Mark of the Manticore" so "Malicious Truth" is getting pushed out of inventory :) Sale Sale Sale!!! I have copies... Help spread the word ~share this status :)

Mark of the Manticore Trailer.wmv

2010-10-16T06:28:00.000-07:00

Excitment is Brewing!!

2010-07-21T18:54:00.000-07:00

After many months of editing and reworking, my second completed novel Mark of the Manticore is Finally in the works for publication. JimSam Inc. has agreed to publish this Fantasy/SciFi and I am over the top excited.

Mark of the Manticore is my second completed novel and is the first of a series. The story itself involves the Heavens and a mythical creature which has been defined as the most vicious cruelest creature of all mythical creatures.

As soon as I get more information, I will be posting it here on my official blog, as well as my website.

Thanks
A~

Mother's Day Gift Giving

2010-05-03T11:46:00.000-07:00

With Mother's Day right around the corner, give the gift of Literature...Send that special Mom an autographed copy of 'Malicious Truth'

http://aprilgutierrez.webs.com/apps/webstore/products/show/903326

Hurry while supplies last!

The tittling fact of family

2009-12-09T18:30:00.002-08:00

I think a light may have shown tonight on the cause of why the holidays seem to be an alternate universe for me. The answer came in the form of an annoying letter from an anonymous source. Yes, pathetic I would have to say, but the only word I feel strong enough to express by its purpose, is annoyance. I am irritated by those who hide their words and agendas behind a mask of anonymity. You want to argue and belittle, have some dignity to do so in plain light. Making attacks and irrelevant comments which have No foundation, is a waste of time and paper. Degrading yourself by putting others down is a true light into whom you truly are. The wicked and blasphemous being is not who you are mad at; your words seem to cut a path into self loathing and pettiness.
This time of year was meant for family. The troubled lines that all families thread on, is based on a foundation of love. Many years of beautiful moments, suffocating mistakes, and ongoing changes create a parallel universe. This is where I am at. Standing on a cliff watching the tide roll in and waiting for the storm to clear, waiting for my ship to land with those who make it all better. But the ship never comes, the dark waters continue to crash against my pain making me believe that all waiting was for nothing.
Family is by far one of the most important things in my existence. I have this unbreakable desire to have what I had as a child. Parents, grandparents, siblings, cousins and friends all together for a blink of a lifetime. My Christmas spirit is linked to these few chaotic and event filled breaths. They are the only memories that seem to take my breath away when I close my eyes and recall them. The heat of the house, the smell of the food, the ambiance of all the little mini-lights that filled the front yard. The music of dances that sang in the background. The laughter that echoed down the halls to the rooms of our refuge late into the night. I miss the eggnog and flan, while sitting at an almost empty table talking to those kindred family members that didn’t want it to end either. Those who knew what it truly meant.
I miss every moment shared with every single one of them. Nothing will bring back the glue that was. It is forever lost with the circle of life. I can only hope that I overcome this sad time, when I too have not laid to rest the lost link. When I too think of what was. What I wouldn’t do to move heaven and earth for one more stolen second with her precious heart, her beautiful soul that taught me the most important lesson in life. Family, no matter how torn is far more important than any spite, any anger or resentment that might be felt.
What bothers me the most is that the only reason the love does not live on is because of the pettiness of troubled egos. Everyone grieves; some more common than most. But some can’t let go, can’t grow, forever living in a tormented past where ignorance is prevalently displayed. This is not the time of year to send anonymous letters to those who once loved you more than life, believed in you and cherished your friendship. Now is not the time to push irrelevant anger into a present tense. We are who we have become; we are who we cherished the most. All the wondrous and humble experiences glow within, allowing for her single most precious wish to one day be fulfilled.

What bothers me the most is that the first action was a stone rather than an embrace.

Official Website Launch

2009-09-17T14:22:00.000-07:00

Spent some time this morning creating a website.

http://www.aprilgutierrez.webs.com

Go check it out, and let me know what you think.

Thanks,
April Gutierrez

Release of Thoughts

2009-08-29T07:26:00.000-07:00

I’m really tired and cannot write on my story….
Some things in life are not certain.

I was once sat down by a “teacher” who wanted to pass down a word of advice. Mind you at 17 I thought I knew all there was to know. I could no sooner imagine that life would be what it truly is. The choices, the paths, and the ultimate consequences we end up dealing with. The advice was to play the chess board in your mind before you made a decision. Simple I would say, but then the variables were never explained to me.
The variables are the fatal diagnoses just when you were thinking of having children, the drunk drivers on a Sunday morning drive, the hangovers just before your wedding, little oops’ that cause life to become a little more complicated. The variables are not on the calendar, they are life’s unexpected guests, life’s practical jokes. They come in all shapes and sizes and at any moment of the day. They can be friends who are upset, or someone new that just has no idea. They can be family from out of town or the sibling that never calls. The variables can be your best friend who has done something out of character or your husband who’s taken on a hobby.
Contemplating everything becomes dull and we tend to forget that once upon a time we were completely different people, fun people, organic, everyday run of the mill people. The speed bumps causing for all the rough edges, for a once polished face.
Its 1251 in the morning and I’ve been up all night. I’m not tired but I want to sleep. I see the images of faces I’ve never met, I hear the voices of a conversation that I just wrote. I just turned 29 and I feel like I’m about to explode. I go go go and nothing gets done. The only thing I can control is how the stories will end and look at me, crying because of their happiness. The variables are the left hooks that no one saw coming. The path that you take when you didn’t know you were walking. I understand that path, those steps. They are familiar and yet my hands and legs fight against the waves that crash, the current too dark, too violent. The sea too unsteady.
I want to close my eyes at the start of a sunset and just feel the heat leaving the land. And know, even though my eyes are closed that when I open them there will be no more light. There is nothing wrong with wanting. There is nothing wrong with loving the “what” that makes certain things important. Tomorrow is uncertain, and yesterday is over. What does that make today…the chess board being wiped clean?

Sexy Summer Reading of Malicious Truth Pictures

2009-08-21T15:31:00.000-07:00

These are the pictures from Thursday August 20th Reading at the Green Iguana Veterans
Tampa Bay...

Malicious Truth on Britney.com

2009-08-17T12:21:00.000-07:00

I entered a contest on Britney Spear's website early this year(2009) Where I used a clip from "Malicious Truth". They Posted the context of my application on Britney.com. There are lots of others who were also posted but WOW was I surprised and Excited a part of the ones they selected to post.

http://www.britney.com/dk-en/malicious-truth

Check it out :)

Sexy Summer Reading Party

2009-08-14T19:24:00.000-07:00

I will be holding a Book signing event for Malicious Truth, Thursday August 20th, 2009 at the Green Iguana Veterans on Anderson in Tampa Florida from 6:30PM - 9:30PM.
The Green Iguana's address is: 9202 Anderson Blvd; Tampa, FL 33634

I will be reading sections from Malicious Truth throughout the night and signing books. There will be Complimentary hors d'oeuvres served and a cash bar.

I am super Excited to have this opportunity so come join me!

Another clip from Mark of the Manticore, Book two

2009-07-31T22:08:00.000-07:00

“I saw him. It was not a dream. It was not an illusion. I saw him as I see you now, staring at me with contempt in his eyes. Look at me, look at what I have done. I have brought you, a mere mortal to the darkest realm ever created, my pure dear brother. The only hope for my salvation and I have tainted your path with this..this chaotic destruction. I don’t know what to do anymore Sonticus. We can pace the length of this room a thousand steps but the end result will forever be the same…”
Korha shook her head in frustration. “I saw him Sonticus, it was him. There, staring at me, telling me that he too would have his revenge. And what can I do about that. I need him. We all need him. Do I ignore the path that I am headed on for the sake of my child. For the safety of our own skin? I would no sooner pull that dagger from his chest.”
Sonticus stood in front of her old post bed. He walked across the room to the very path that lead to the mirrors. “why is it you that he haunts Korha, why not the others, why not the ultimate being?”
Korha did not need to contemplate the answer. She knew, she’d always known. Since she heard of the love that Lilith and Lucipher had once shared, Korha knew the connection and why it was so powerful.
“because I was what he always wanted” Once the words were set free from her lips Korha fell to the ground buckled in pain. The screaming coming all at once. Sonticus ran to her side, lifting her pregnant figure, taking her to the bed. There was little time. They would need to go back to the realm of the Manticore's for the book. The decision made, the light at the end of the tunnel starting to grow bright once more. They had a purpose, the answer was clear. The choice she was meant to make was not whether to destroy him or herself in the second battle, it was whether to keep the light in her heart, the forbidden path that had been set before the prophecy had even been created.
She began to whisper the words the voices were speaking, the language exotic, beautiful like a hymn.
“If mother were here she would know what you were saying, she would tell you that you are strong and that this too shall pass.” Sonticus said trying to soothe her.
The voices subsided and Korha gave Sonticus the knowing eye. It was time, they had to get done what was meant to be done.
“let me grab the sack” he said, running into Lucipher's chamber for the sack that Korha had taken in there.
The past had been told, the present was bleak, but the future, yes the future was filled with light. For once, she realized that the fates did not control everything. They could wield the web for all to accept, or one could contradict and create their own web. Creation only done by a yang. Korha was a yang as Lilith had been, as the Ultimate being had always been. The secret held far deeper meaning than what Lucipher could imagine, what he could understand. And when Love was present, when life was created, a spark of hope appeared.

New Favorite Lyrics!

2009-06-03T12:49:00.000-07:00

Stained- "Everything Changes"

"If you just walked away
What could I really say?
Would it matter anyway?
Would it change how you feel?

I am the mess you chose
The closet you cannot close
The devil in you I suppose
'Cause the wounds never heal

But everything changes
If I could
Turn back the years
If you could
Learn to forgive me
Then I could learn to feel

Sometimes the things I say
In moments of disarray
Succumbing to the games we play
To make sure that it's real

But everything changes
If I could
Turn back the years
If you could
Learn to forgive me
Then I could learn to feel

When its just me and you
Who know what we could do
If we can just make it through
The toughest part of the day

But everything changes
If I could
Turn back the years
If you could
Learn to forgive me
Then I could
Learn how to feel
Then we could
Stay here together
And we could
Conquer the world
If we could
Say that forever
Is more than just a word

If you just walked away
That could i really say?
And would it matter anyways?
It wouldnt change how you feel"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wEc5kaBuQ90

I Couldnt Help it...Another Clip of Mark 2

2009-05-31T21:47:00.000-07:00

Azezyal watches me, the voices in my head becoming more a constant every waking moment. I can see his fear, the way he pleads for me to speak with him, the times he attempts to cover my naked skin. I dare not cover the growing skin, the belly that had taken shape. I can see how it now begins to move, the little hands pressing outwards, stretching, letting me know that its thriving.
He means well, but I cannot keep the candles lit. I try but the flames forever disappearing, the smoke filling the air causing a mist to take over. The eyes beyond the trees that watch us also make their presence known more often than ever. I have not changed form since those first few days back. I have not left; Azezyal’s fear that I will be forever lost has grown much since I began to show with child. He leaves, the crow in his being capable of flying above the shelter of the deafening trees.
Again the cries in my ears shout words that I could never comprehend. One by one they argue, when I think I have a grasp of silencing them, I realize that once again they screech the unknowables. The candles distracting me, one by one I relight them, the water below them mirroring the light as though we are covered by hundreds of thousands of little lights, illuminating the night that persists. The madness ensuing, until I can no longer bear the exhaustion my mind has created for me and I fall. The sleep reminding me that tomorrow is what is uncertain. Every moment I live, breathing and going forward is one more day that he is gone. One more day that I am the greatest deceiver. One more wasted chance to correct the pains of the past.
And even with sleep the fight persists. I am forever haunted. He is there, waiting. Silent and horribly still. The look he gave me, that final moment. It is then, in my dreams, when I am not dreaming but merely reliving my memory over and over, I see him. I touch him. I tell him how horribly sorry I am, but I can never remove the dagger from his chest. It implanted so deep that even the darkest of magic could not eradicate the wrong.
So I wake, with his eyes still burning my soul. I wake to the voices still screaming in my ear, to the candles still burning out when they are meant to shine bright, to replace the morning star that I took. Ripped it from the lands, from all that was created, causing the unbalance. Yes, he is gone.
Azezyal returns, finding Korha merely moments from having woken, his concern greater. The expression grave which he carries.
“There is news. They have manned the seven arch angels in a great search for this realm. You are to be found and returned unharmed.
Korha shook her head, laughing at the absurd thought. “As if they could if they tried.” Her arrogance matching that of her Lucipher’s.
She had known what she was capable of doing. The only one competent of killing her was gone. He was lost. Forsaken in a cruel vicious betrayal.

Hehehe

Mark 2...hehehehe...torture!

2009-05-29T10:11:00.000-07:00

Just a Clip...

The mirrors, I thought. The mirrors have become distorted, their view having gone from clear beauty to a sinister emptiness. I the reason the chaos has erupted in the heavens. I the reason nothing was as it should be. The light striped from all that is seen, all that was created. The jumbled voices in my mind louder in this place, the laughter unsupportable. The peace having been stripped from my soul the moment I took him, unknowing how linked he was to me. Repair the damage, bring back that which was forsaken, and undo the wrong. Could it be possible? And there in that question lays the whisper plaguing me. There in the thoughts lay the angry screaming silence. The need to face the darkness of the mirrors was evident by the pulling force which brought me here, but standing in the archway from what was once my room, to the emptiness that was once his refuge, caution I reminded myself. Finally stepping forward I felt the chill of his absence, the desire for his presence. Torn by the two I forced myself to walk, to make my way to the very place I caught him planted at so many times before. The mirror was large, and as I rounded its face, I became acutely aware of the insanity that was soon to curse me. His face, his beautiful features horribly set by the anger. His eyes set ablaze by something deeper yet then anger, Pain. The betrayal unforgiveable. That he had taken my soul both times, comforted me, consoled me and sheltered me and my actions treachery in his heart. The pain he felt was mirrored in my own soul. I had not wanted to destroy him, I had not wanted to prove disloyal, but the choices were not forthcoming. The outcome was this. I watched in my reflection the mar that could never be repaired. The madness and destruction of my soul was evident. The child growing within soon to be lost as well, for nothing could erase the mistakes. They would soon track my steps and lost would be all that was beautiful and whole. The tear I’d been holding fell from my cheek. And he, reaching out to catch it was faced with the hard edge of the mirror, the very thing that separated us. “My beautiful dark prince, what have I done” my whisper causing his rage, unleashing the beast. What was once my reflection, was now that which was my match, and yet he’d become no match at all. I shook my head and fell to my knees. I could not watch him enraged by my need for him, by my regret. And then, as the pain reached the deepest crevasses of my soul I heard him. The voices no more mangled in my ear.
“get up” his voice level. In disbelief I did as I was told. Looking once more to the mirror, it was him, his eyes clearer, his fury hampered. I could no sooner believe that this madness was real. I reached out and touched the cold hard surface of the mirror. “tell me” was all I could whisper to him.
“I will never forgive you princess of my soul, I will forever torture you” the deepness of his voice chilling. And with his grave meaning he was gone. Vanishing into the emptiness within. It was then that I knew he had become a part of me, it was then that I realized I would never be half of the pureness that created me.

Forever the great teaser!

Something from Book 4

2009-05-21T13:57:00.000-07:00

<< Damn the memories that persist. The effect of running away was pointless. I thought I had been running from the feeling of failure, the horrid embarrassment of having my faults one by one pointed out by others who felt themselves above me. I thought that near someone who I trusted, all would be better, all would change. I was wrong. I was a fool to run to the one person I trusted, the one person who I’d ever needed. I went from being embarrassed to being lost. I hadn’t traveled three thousand miles from the pain, I traveled that distance to be cradled and saved. And in all that time, all those sleepless nights I went from forgetting what I left, to worrying about what I had. The fear seeping in that at any given moment it would all be taken away. I would wake up and realize that the amazing man before me was a façade, he would always and forever simply be a friend, and just as before all those years past he would leave me, choosing another.
Nothing will wash away the fear, and the idea of what possibly could, still would be the end of all that has been. So I sit here and watch as the wind brings in a storm, one that matches that of my thoughts. The wind playing with the hanging chimes, creating a melody capable of drugging one to sleep. The clouds growing darker, the shadows dancing across the fields of hay. I sit here rocking on the porch, holding my swollen belly, humming to the chimes as they play. We wait for him to come home, wait to feel his comfort, to feel the peace his presence brings. And as I feel the tender kicks of little feet, I realized that he will come home, he will choose me. I am everything he has ever wanted, since that night as children he yelled at me when I fell, that I had to be stronger, that I had to take his hand and get up, that we still had to keep going, that either way he would be there to hold my hand.
Maybe all I’ve needed this whole time was to finally get back what I’d lost ten years ago... I needed him to take my hand and tell me that no matter what we still had to keep going. That he would be there to hold my hand. I know that it will work because he loves me, not that he has said it but looking at all that has happened in the past few months I know. It’s hard to ignore when you live with your best friend. It’s simple to see in all the little things he does. A look can say so many more things than a word can express. >>>

if that isnt a teaser I dont know what could be...
A-

Family

2009-04-29T18:44:00.000-07:00

Beyond all I’ve learned as of late, I seem to be receiving a hefty lesson on mortality. Not necessarily my own but the light beams in many directions. The reflection opening my eyes to those daunting questions I have always had. I would never openly admit that curiosity has me stunned. I found myself at the hospital today, visiting a family member. The visit was short but the point came across clear. The love and adoration expressed adamantly. It was not until my drive home between calls and texts that I realized the many tomorrows that I am blessed with and the lack thereof of others. I wanted to turn the car around and drive back to the hospital. To clear the air to all the many things that have never been said. I know that some things need not be said but still sometimes it is nice to hear. I have always been a firm believer that love is better shown by actions than by simply stating it. My faith took over and I kept on driving home. I recalled the happy face sunflower that the kids picked out and the little balloon that was propped up next to the flower on the window sill of the room. I could only imagine the facial expression that they would bring about when seen for the first time.
I want to say that my lesson was the importance of family, but I have a funny feeling that this lesson goes much deeper than that. It is not just how important family is, it is how you spend your time with them, it is the giving, the actions, the Love. I look at my life and feel a great loss of family connection. I long for the days as a child when there was never a doubt that I would see or talk to a sibling, cousin, aunt or uncle. I yearn for those family gatherings that fill the soul with good feelings. To visit our roots and extend who we truly are to one another. It’s become the same feeling I get with Christmas, a lost emotion that makes me feel empty. No matter how much I search for it, replicate actions from the past, the feeling is the same and ominous as ever. So many concessions made and to be made. And as much as I look at the solution and how simple it comes out to, the odds remain a bleak as ever.
The greatest and closest of families is held by one great force. Once the magnet is lost, the connection is severed. The great force could never be replaced, for its unique strength is the fingerprint that is family. One by one the little ones grow up and become their own great forces, forever foregoing their past. My lesson is accepting that I have become my own great force. My lesson is learning how to let go of the loved ones that leave us to the next world. My lesson is accepting that the eyes I see with now are the same as the great forces of the past.

The many concessions

2009-04-22T18:31:00.000-07:00

Being a parent in the eyes of April.
Laugh if you will, as I often do, at my version of being a parent. From the day I had Adriano I became speechless at how the beating of my heart accelerated by the very beauty of a sleeping child held ever so close to my chest. The tiny fingers and toes that move slightly as they sleep. The little smile that creeps up on their cheeks when you think the day couldn’t get any worse. Every day that you fight the fears of what is to come, you know that it is all worth it because it is for them. The struggles and heartache that are faced are valued as life lessons, something that comes with the definition of parenting. The devastation that is felt when that little bundle of yours faces a fever or much worse, it is respected because our strength is what keeps them fighting. In raising Adriano I found that love is treasured more than being young and silly. Being a mom was the gift that someone, much wiser than I, bestowed on me. Little Michael added to the mix that laughter is much more reasonable than a headache and insanity. The bond of brothers, which I had never realized, was a reality all in its own. With my second borne son I was rewarded a new level of patience. With the laughter that ensued and the immeasurable arguing, I sought perseverance on the things that I would never understand, that I couldn’t control, and that I could never change. Forgiving so much more than any other thinking possible, accepting responsibility far more times than before. With two there is twice the heartache. The beautiful characteristics that little Michael has shown me has awaken my belief in music and sound. That little voice that hums along to a beloved song, even through the most painful of exhaustions and trouble of health. Blessed was I to carry yet a third most adored gift. Savannah awoke in me a maternal instinct that I had long thought lost. A child of my heart. Scary as it sounds, she is the little me that I had always hoped for. Strong minded, independent, and full of personality. Being her mother has taught me thus far that a girl is more fragile than first thought to be. It is not the volume of your voice that matters, it is the tone and the words extended. The little things will always matter, even when they seem ill ideal. The compassion, the caress, the smiles and tenderness always key. Being her mother has made me realize that the rose colored glasses are allowed to come on to tell a beautiful fairy tale. The crass and blunt nature of raising boys is not always the right fit for a girl. I have missed a vital element in this little blog. When I was 20, still young and naive, I was presented the possibility of becoming a step mother to a soon to be teenager. Laugh because being a parent to my own children wouldn’t have been any easier had I not taken this task head first. I fell in love with not only Mike but also of forever having a step daughter. Being a parent to her was an eye opening experience. I learned that thinking Outside of the box truly is important, even if it means that I don’t have my way. Assuming is bad because it goes against communication. Unconditional love is not given solely to the children you bare, it is given to those you care for. Their best interest should always be taken into account, because there is no room for selfishness in being a parent. The beauty of truth. The fundamental values of impenetrable honesty. The live by example rule. My choices and lack there-of, are the foundation of who I am. The ideal that being a parent signifies being your children’s role model.
Being a parent is much like the love that is shared. It is priceless. It cannot be replaced. It is not exchangeable. It is a bond that travels with you always. The many concessions that are made are acceptable because it seizes to be about yourself and on goes the days of little hiccups and sleepless nights.

The thudding

2009-04-06T14:46:00.000-07:00

Let it out, that's what they say. Getting it off your chest is the easiest part. Well actually I have to argue that. Conversations, aggravations. The distance, the questions. all the convoluted questions of what couldn’t be. And still there was the connection. Ripped apart at the moment because some find comfort in the lashings they can give. The simple disconnect that seeps into the deepest meaning of understanding. The nothingness that follows is always the thudding in my chest.

Oh sometimes I scream inside, but never like now. The restlessness of all that goes on. How there was once something that made me think and now that is over. Gone, like a flash. The easiest thing for some to do, but never me. I grasp on to the faces and voices, holding on for dear life to the sincerity, the honesty. And when that is gone like now, when it is ripped from me, what is ripped with it is a fragment of me. Me who is strong, who is viable, who is deceitful to the eye. Nothing is as it seems. The eye is a jackal of character, always something that truly isn't.

You can see what you want. You can say what you want. You can hear what you want. But the truth is always there. We are only as strong as we when we fall, when we fail, when we are at the end of the road. We are only as strong as the one who reaches out and holds the frail hand in front of us, there to Guide us.

so we take our hearts, and our brains, we take our kidneys and our lungs and waste them. What does it matter if a damn doctor can't operate on the part of your brain that is gonna bust, what does it matter if there is no donor to give you a piece of her body, what does it matter if we cant breath anymore, the thudding will end and the heart will no longer ache for that damn connection. We will reach our hands out above and let ourselves be found by those reaching for us. The ones willing to give us strength and courage. The ones that don’t give up and leave us.

That’s what I didn’t say. That’s what I wanted to scream. Doesn’t make the thudding any easier, doesn’t make goodbye my top choice.

COSMO PETITION

2009-03-24T11:01:00.000-07:00

Hi Everyone!!
Okay Folks...Its ON!! In case you don’t know me, my name is APRIL GUTIERREZ, author of MALICIOUS TRUTH. This is my Petition to have “Malicious Truth” put in Cosmo's Cosmolicious book section. All of us women know that spicy romance novels are the chocolate of our lives, and well, Men like to imagine the hotness in its content. I NEED all of my supporters and those who just want to see this hot sexy steamy novel in a leading women’s magazine. sign your name to this petition, pass it around, forward it, clip it, post it, blog it, bulliten it, link it, myspace it, facebook it, twitter it, and ask all your friends to help out.

You will have to create a free membership with Gopetition.com, it will take all of 30 seconds of your time.

http://www.gopetition.com/online/26391.html

If you Haven't Purchased Malicious Truth yet, Never fear...
http://jimsaminc.com/jimsam/bookstore/gutierrez.html
http://www.amazon.com/Malicious-Truth-April-Gutierrez/dp/098169148X/ref=cm_cr_pr_pb_t

Copy and paste this blog and pass it to EVERYONE you know and EVERYONE they know!!!
http://aprilgutierrez.blogspot.com/
I'm also going to create a Youtube video soon to go along with this ;) Spicen it up a notch!!

Thank you EVERYONE!!!
A

Darkness

2009-03-20T11:54:00.001-07:00

The morbid thoughts that unfold, the uncouth things that pass thy lips.
Swarming are the ideas of how the face will pale whence the blood stops flowing. The moment the heart denies its vital beat to its longing host. How all that was will be no more. The last flash of light, the final memory. The brain will freeze and no more will the pain cause distress.
How we learn to cherish the breath we take when confronted with our mortality. The daylight will never be as beautiful as the one seen on your final morning, the sunset no more spectacular. The emotion of being in love no less erratic as the day you feel them slipping away.
How simple the act of expression is, how uneducated most are in its function. Scream it from every pore, every touch, and every tear that streams down a face. The words invalid if the action is irrelevant. Seeing is believing. The distance shows much more, its truth is in the absence. More accustomed to believing the ones that are visible, every minute of every day.
No more tomorrows, their existence uncertain. No more are the maybes and could have beens. It is now that matters, time being stolen in a cruel vindictive way. So the heart beats as best it may, thumping at all the possibilities. The should have beens lost in the past of regrets unspoken. The faces that haunt, the eyes that burn but the memory still moves forward. Etching precious gifts for the nothingness of tomorrow to steal.
Then it hits you like a ton of bricks. What is left behind is much more precious than all you’ve lived. Fight for every gift that you’ve been blessed with, every love that you have shared. And if tomorrow never comes you know that somewhere somehow that love lives on in the smallest of treasures.

Something...Small...New...

2009-03-10T09:20:00.000-07:00

Time and time again I find myself back in the same place I started. De Ja Vu would be more welcoming if I believed that I wouldn’t be hurting at the end of the night. Staring out into the darkness, the tear streaming down my cheek, silently the prayer is always the same. The face that torments the night when the eyes are closed, the rain as it falls on the face washing away the tears, the heat from the sun as it does its best to warm. The moments that never fade. The kiss that still burns the skin. The look that never changes, its need evident every time. The goodbyes still causing so much pain, which never diminishes. I could almost accept that you’re not here, that I wouldn’t be able to turn around and feel the contours of your back, but I can’t accept it, I can’t accept that once in good conscience I had the one thing that made me tick, once in the crevice of my heart I was complete. Now, I have to be satisfied knowing that you are alive, knowing that someone else fills the void, while I sit here, my heart broken into a thousand pieces, never again allowed to love.
Time and time again I find myself back in the same place, mourning the loss of a man. Doesn’t make it any easier that time has passed. Doesn’t make it any easier knowing that I loved him enough to let him go. Look what it got me, nothing, years of silence knowing that I was the last person on the planet he wanted to be with. Years of wishing on a star that my prince would return.

The discussion of Soul Mates

2009-02-27T09:24:00.000-08:00

One of the main themes of my second novel “Mark of the Manticore” is Soul mates. What does that consist of exactly? I have read and reread what the story entails and all which has gone into the connection which my characters share. But the true meaning in my mind may be more of a fairy tale then one exulted in reality. Of course the book is fiction, but what person doesn’t want to feel a connection to another person half way across the planet. To be laying on your deathbed and whisper “I love you” into the darkness of space and them just know somewhere in time and in space of distance that your last breath was spent on them. The heart wants what is wants and in wanting that it concedes to so many contradictions. To love that which could kill you, to need the touch that burns your soul more than the air you breathe. To be near them when so many things are against you. You would submit yourself; give up all the things in life to have one moment, one single precious moment to look in their eyes just to be assured they love you back with the same intensity.
The simplicity of a soul mate is that you never have to fight to get back to them. They are there when you need them most. Unyielding their nature to be with you, in physical form or in spirit, either way, by your side, giving you strength to do that which is in your path to do. Holding your hand in a manner that subsides any doubts that could have been. There is no such thing as enough is enough because tomorrow is the most uncertain thing in our mortal existence, tomorrow may never come and to them, waste is the passed moment where the feeling is not returned.
Soul mates, yes maybe a fairy tale but something I think we all want to find and experience, even if it is forbidden.

You Help is Requested :)

2009-02-17T07:30:00.000-08:00

Still the content of Book 3 is being kept a secret but your help would be GREAT :)

Homework for my friends and readers :) ALL ANONYMOUS OF COURSE!!

LIST THE TOP 10 THINGS THAT ARE YOUR BIGGEST PET PEEVES ABOUT YOUR PARTNER! BOYFRIEND, GIRLFRIEND, HUSBAND, WIFE, WHATEVER!! EX'S ARE OKAY TOO :)
ANYTHING FROM "FARTING IN PUBLIC" TO "NOT GETTING IT DONE IN THE BEDROOM"
:) HAVE FUN, AND THINK COMEDY, NO HOLDS BAR, ROLLING ON THE FLOOR LAUGHING OUT LOUD!

LIST FROM 1-10, 1 BEING THE WORST ON YOUR LIST

YOU CAN EITHER POST HERE OR EMAIL THEM TO ME...I WILL LET YOU KNOW IF I AM CHOOSING YOURS ANONYMOUSLY BEFORE IT GETS IN THE BOOK :)

THANKS AND HAVE FUN!!!!!!!!!!!!

THE L WORD

2009-02-12T11:35:00.001-08:00

If its bad enough that most men don't know the importance of the L word, imagine a mother taking the time to explain it to her little boy. Imagine having to explain Valentine ’s Day to a child who thinks that it’s just another holiday to GET something. Well, I sat the boys down...looked at them...calculated what it was exactly that I was going to say to them. I should have known better. I should have written it down and read it to them, and come up with possible answers to the amazing things they would for sure come up with. It kind of went like this:

Me: "Okay boys...Let me explain something really simple to you...this Valentine’s Day I want you to tell your grandmothers and dad that you love them."
Oldest boy: "why?" annoyed that he would have to speak, much less be mushy while speaking.
Little boy: "What? We aren’t buying them chocolate this year?" scrunching his face like he was in pain
Me: "No chocolate this year, and anyways, saying you love someone is worth so much more."
Oldest boy: "I think they would believe it more if we gave them chocolate." rolling his eyes at me.
Little boy: "well can I have daddy’s chocolate?" knowing that daddy was sure to be getting chocolate.
Me: "what do you think money grows on trees?" instantly having a homer moment knowing that the little boy feeds off my sarcasm.
Little boy: "mommy...money does grow on trees...hello...paper...trees...money..."
Oldest boy: "don’t talk to mom like that...she won’t buy you the chocolate!"
Little boy: "yeah she will, I will tell her I love her and cash in on the rewards because "I LOVE YOU" is worth more than anything, ask daddy!"
Me: "you will do no such thing!" mad at the fact that they had turned a simple topic of conversation into a learned form of manipulation.
SO it occurred to me that men are not horrible people...it’s their damn mothers putting ideas in their head from youth. So now I think I will band the L word during Valentine’s Day...because just as most men feel, it’s a commercialized holiday meant to put the flower and chocolate business in the black. What I do have a problem with is figuring out why little boys know more then their fathers...

MAJOR BOOK REVIEW :)

2009-02-10T18:55:00.000-08:00

***** A charming, realistic story about how things really are, February 6, 2009
By Midwest Book Review (Oregon, WI USA)

Ignorance is bliss, as so often those who find an unpleasant truth say. "Malicious Truth" is follows Ava as she deals with a world filled with lies and deception. When there is so much deceit surrounding her, she soon finds that a happy ending is almost impossible, and just admitting one's flaws is not enough. Imperfection and flaw is another major element making "Malicious Truth" a charming, realistic story about how things really are.

http://www.amazon.com/Malicious-Truth-April-Gutierrez/review/product/098169148X/ref=dp_top_cm_cr_acr_txt?ie=UTF8&showViewpoints=1

Something Really Old #1

2009-02-05T18:08:00.001-08:00

The sun filtered through the window across from where I sat in the living room. It was close to four in the afternoon. The events of the day had bestowed a change in my world which had once felt so normal. The chimes on our clock began to ring and instantly the silence struck more than a cord in my mind. To begin with Love and end with confusion, the questions that followed for endless. All along the answers seem to be staring you straight in the face. The beauty of fidelity and trust, the awareness of strength and comfort, and the power of effort and compromise.
When a person concludes that life is to be shares with a soul mate, expectations grow from within their own heart. Soon a partnership forms between two people who share a special connection. The connection is Love. Love, which happens to be, by far the most confusing emotion a human being can experience. Love, which holds the power to make you or break you, for when it grows to its extreme heights, it can never, be forgotten. Nothing will ever diminish the passion that it holds. In no degree could anything possibly destroy the wealth that love brings to a soul.
When love engulfs two people in a realm of happiness, it is as if their future can be written. untold at first, life is leading us down many winding roads which obscure tests are thrown at us, bewildering us and the reality in which we live. Every turn leaving us to question the love that is held at the end of day. A person must come to grips with the fact that the love one feels for another changes, for it is as a comparison to the wind that blows and the every changing currents of the seas, rocking out existence in ever manner. At the beginning there is a giddiness and mysterious concept of our other person. Over time that mystery becomes partial to comfort and compassion. Even the passion of romance degrades itself with the unyielding ease of our other. The key is to keep the basis of initial love close at hand.
There comes a time in every relationship, rather it be a marriage or a simple commitment, when either individual is taunted by tempting choices. It does not take a skillful person to keep reality close in hand. Unfortunate but true to know that in reality, outside sources hold cruelty close in hand. There may be no other reason for the interference except that happiness is envied by so many. Everyone wants happiness, so when that simple emotion is unattainable, disaster occur. Sometimes we do not see the logic for we are blinded by sorrows and self pity for the failure in trials we have faced. We omit to realize that we are human and in being so, we are prone to mistake. To give up on a relationship that has history, without trying to compromise or even attempt sacrificing self-comfort for the one you are committed to, is more of a sin then to commit an infidelity.
There were once a few very unwise fellows who stated “it is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all.” Try it! For once the love that has been lost is gone, emptiness overwhelms. It engulfs your life, your heart, all the way to the pit of your soul, deep into the crevices where light has never touched. Of course there are also saying such as “when you love someone, let them go, if they return, your love was meant to be, but if they don’t you are better off. “ Or “the grass is always greener on the other side” “love is blind”
Every phrase was thought up by a self loathing individual who spent most of the time drowning in their own self pity. True love is not to be given up on. It is not to be forgotten. It is ridiculous to conceive that moving into a false life, a dream world, will bring happiness. There is no such place as “greener grass”, for if you nurture the grass you have always had, you will be blessed with the greenest and the most enduring.
In the end when you finally analyze the questions in your mind, what is left? The choices that you have given were worth nothing. The anxiety that was felt only made other emotions scramble for control. Then your control, which up until the moments before, were confronted by life’s joke called change, had not begun to falter. The abandonment of reason had continuously threatened a future, which at one point not too long ago, was filled with goals that were to be shared alongside that partner of yours. When all the questions become emotionally exhausting, it is sincerity that overcomes the insanity, thus allowing for the answers to flow appropriately. Always keeping close at hand the knowledge that “love always prevails”
If a matter is magnified to a degree that an end seems almost inevitable, giving up on a relationship is just as it sounds. You cheat yourself, leaving out real love based on confusion, leaving behind all that you had once built, all for fear of failing. The only answer is that you only truly fail when you give up trusting love. It is safe to say that not every question can be answered. It has to be also understandable that those questions that are answered with the truth may hurt such as a knife stabbing an already opened wound. Gracefully accepting one’s change and mistakes altogether strengthens a love by power of compromise and effort.
When the phone rang and woke me up from my deep trance of thought, reality came tumbling in. what had I done? I quickly got up and reached for the phone. The line had gone dead as I picked up the receiver. My heart began to question what I had truly transpired. This whole time the key to making everything right, the answers to everything you’d asked me were right in my heart. The fear swiftly shocked me as I replaced the receiver. Could one ever repair the damage caused when selfishness over comes our lives. The consequences which lead us to the only realization common for regret. “You don’t know what you have until you lose it”

Number 3

2009-02-05T08:58:00.000-08:00

Well, with number 2 done and request sent out for that one, I have decided that I need a distraction, and what better distraction can I give myself then a new book. I started a few days ago but have only been able to dedicate a few hours because of school. BUT I am going to start full force in the next day or so. The clock is ticking, I want to complete this one in the same time it took to complete the others...see if I can beat my score on days, lol...so my typing will get a healthy challenge. AND if anyone is curious, it is another spicy romance but I will let the story stay a secret since its more of a punch line :)

The sadness that overwhelms

2009-01-31T10:54:00.000-08:00

In life there are moments that we sometimes feel are unbearable...moments that our hearts break into pieces so small, that in the back of our minds we fear that there would never quite possible be enough glue to put it back together. Moments that the clarity of what is to come is shadowed by the ache that has consumed. Nothing dulls that ache. The music is not loud enough to deafen. The alcohol never does its required justice to intoxicate the senses. The sound of crashing waves could never drown the sorrow that envelops the aura of hurt. The nights are only silent moments of horrific memory and the dawn that brings in the unwelcomed rays of light remind us that we are here, left to continue on breathing and living. Unbearable are those moments, helpless and of uninvited discontent, where yet another dream is crushed into the oblivion of nothingness. The sadness that overwhelms seeks us out, testing our soul. The very souls that have been tested so many times such as this, it is more of the same. Keep moving, keep breathing, and Keep reminding your heart to thud against the bones that protect its priceless existence. What more do you want? What more can one give? The board is slowly clearing out, those paths unattainable now; the roads have been shut for so many smiles.

2009-01-15T10:17:00.000-08:00

If you Breed a BullDog...

and a Shitzu...

Would the puppies be called Bullshitz?
hahahahaha

A Little Something to Say!

2009-01-13T14:46:00.000-08:00

So I have something minuscule to say to those who come to this page which have either read or are reading "Malicious Truth"...I've recently been thrown a dodge ball in a direction of Author Hell. SOMEONE is under the very asinine assumption that I am the main character in this fictitious romance novel. The simple answer to that is No, Ava is not April Gutierrez.Very simple, very CLEAR. I know that as an author I will, from time to time, come across people who are curious and can't understand the simple basics of the imagination. That's kewl, especially considering they have yet to read my next completed novel, which is sure to piss some people off.
Back to the point of this Blog. I will NOT however be appeased with individuals who feel that it is within their ability to taunt, bait, or talk down my happiness and life with those assumptions they feel imposed on making. I do not hide behind a face of what is and what isn't, so someone blindly making an outlandish taunt behind the bushes of life should make sure they have their facts in order.
Don't make statements that sound like fighting words if your not ready to take off the mask and fight fair!
Oh and by the way...The Stalking needs to STOP!

LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-01-13T11:38:00.000-08:00

On a RaNT

2009-01-07T15:10:00.000-08:00

Gotta laugh...I'm on a rant of the most peculiar kind. I have recently purchased myself a new cat, yes the feline kind. I made this purchase so that I may in turn have kittens eventually. I had a female and I bought a male, his name is Tom...I should have named him Lucifer for he is the devil himself. No one in the house likes him, he has the oddest addiction to bread and is as mischievous as they come. I have spent the better part of 2 months defending and excusing the little bastards actions but damn enough if I can't today. I have gone to the extend of making sure no food is EVER left out, I have taken to putting the bread either in the closed door pantry or high up on a ledge in the kitchen...To no avail has any of my efforts prevailed. The damn heathen has trumped me. I had chicken in the sink defrosting, he tore open the plastic wrap and decided that raw meat was his new delight. WTF! What bugged me the most was my dog (who is an Angel) takes it upon himself to fight with the cat for the piece of chicken...OMG he is not only a pain in the A$$ he is now a bad influence on my DOG.
The worst part of the whole situation is that my female cat (Cora) has not gone into heat since this little bastard came home. I think he has stressed her out sooooo much that she has been desensitized into not wanting a litter of kittens with this monster. I can just imagine her argument but is there honestly a way for a cat to force herself to NOT have kittens? and if so why can't women accomplish such a feat.
I know eventually he will grow out of his curious ways but he is half a year old.
Moral of the story: make sure you get the stats on the pussy before you pay money for it!

Holiday Magic

2008-12-09T08:44:00.000-08:00

I sat down the other night with my horrendous list of things to do and had the same reoccuring feeling that I have every year at this same time. Being a parent is rough, no one said it was going to be easy either, but my optomistic personality kinda brushes peoples warnings to the side and I tend to take things as they come...it is what it is. I feel I have always been blessed in soooo many ways, and in the department the holidays something has been missing.

Its Christmas Magic.

Every year I find myself on the go from Black Friday to Noche Buena. I feel that as parents the Magic is lost because we never take the time to SIT with the Children and watch the magic through their eyes. Its Utterly Amazing to be a Child during the Holidays...my boys have made 3 different Christmas lists and have mailed them All to the North Pole ;)They anxiously waited to see the lights up front yard and asked a million questions as to why the reindeer moves his head. Of course my oldest has been actively in search for unwrapped toys but still believes in Santa as he is not successful in his search-I'm that good!
So what am I rambling about. I want to feel the same Christmas Magic that my babies feel. I miss it, I yearn for it, I can almost taste it but for some reason it just isn't strong enough.

This year I have opted to hold a special Christmas party at my home, in hopes that all the cheer and possible Kareokee caroling will ignite that sensation deep within my soul.
You may be reading this and saying "WOMAN, all you have to do is BELIEVE!!!"
you are right, thats is all it is, and the goosepimples scatter across my skin when I think about it. I do believe. I have faith that Mircales occur when you least expect it.

That which you seek will appear the moment you quit searching for it...So maybe I will feel it soon enough. I will be surrounded by almost everyone that I Love dear in life and it will happen!

The Magic is in the air, just have to follow the breeze!

Happy Holidays!!

2008-12-01T07:41:00.000-08:00

The Wooden Bowl

I guarantee you will remember the tale of the Wooden Bowl tomorrow, a week from now, a month from now, a year from now.

A frail old man went to live with his son, daughter-in-law, and four-year old grandson.
The old man's hands trembled, his eyesight was blurred, and his step faltered.
The family ate together at the table. But the elderly grandfather's shaky hands and failing sight made eating difficult. Peas rolled off his spoon onto the floor.
When he grasped the glass, milk spilled on the tablecloth.
The son and daughter-in-law became irritated with the mess.
'We must do something about father,' said the son. 'I've had enough of his spilled milk, noisy eating, and food on the floor.'

So the husband and wife set a small table in the corner. There, Grandfather ate alone while the rest of the family enjoyed dinner.
Since Grandfather had broken a dish or two, his food was served in a wooden bowl.

When the family glanced in Grandfather's direction, sometimes he had a tear in his eye as he sat alone.
Still, the only words the couple had for him were sharp admonitions when he dropped a fork or spilled food.

The four-year-old watched it all in silence.

One evening before supper, the father noticed his son playing with wood scraps on the floor.
He asked the child sweetly, 'What are you making?' Just as sweetly, the boy responded,
'Oh, I am making a little bowl for you and Mama to eat your food in when I grow up.'
The four-year-old smiled and went back to work.

The words so struck the parents so that they were speechless.
Then tears started to stream down their cheeks.
Though no word was spoken, both knew what must be done.

That evening the husband took Grandfather's hand and gently led him back to the family table.
For the remainder of his days he ate every meal with the family. And for some reason,
neither husband nor wife seemed to care any longer when a fork was dropped, milk spilled, or the tablecloth soiled.

On a positive note, I've learned that, no matter what happens,
how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow.

I've learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles four things:
a rainy day, the elderly, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights.

I've learned that, regardless of your relationship with your parents,
you'll miss them when they're gone from your life.

I've learned that making a 'living' is not the same thing as making a 'life..'

I've learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance.

I've learned that you shouldn't go through life with a catcher's mitt on both hands.
You need to be able to throw something back

I've learned that if you pursue happiness, it will elude you
But, if you focus on your family, your friends, the needs of others,
your work and doing the very best you can, happiness will find you

I've learned that whenever I decide something with an open heart, I usually make the right decision.

I've learned that even when I have pains, I don't have to be one.

I've learned that every day, you should reach out and touch someone.

People love that human touch -- holding hands, a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back.

I've learned that I still have a lot to learn.

NEXT EVENT!!

2008-11-22T09:18:00.000-08:00

I will have a tented booth at the 4th Annual Chili Cook-Off on Saturday Nov. 29th from 11-3...I will be selling and signing my romance novel Maliious Truth and taking a list of presale for my upcoming book :) You will just have to stop by to get the sneak peak ;)I took an inserpt below from a lady promoting the event on Saturday!!

Hope I see you there!

Its that time of year again! What time? Well, its time for the 4th Annual Chili Cook-off in the Grand Central District of St. Petersburg. Mark your calendars for November 29th from 11:00 a.m. to 3:00 p.m. Between 2000 and 2600 Central Avenue, the streets will be lined with over 25 chili entries. Get your taste buds ready for a treat! I am sure this will be a welcome change after the Thanksgiving turkey is gone. Sample all different types of chili and vote for your favorite.

This is an event for the whole family. Their will be lots of activities to enjoy while tasting your way through the festival. Live music will fill the air while street vendors show off their artwork and crafts. While at the festival, be sure to take time to visit the local shops and restaurants in the area. From antique shops to hair salons, dog grooming to coffee shops, the Grand Central District has a lot to offer. If this is your first visit to the area, get their early to take it all in. So much to do and see!

Number 2 is on it's Way!!!!!!!!!

2008-10-09T17:56:00.000-07:00

Yes sir E Bob! I can not say that I am totally done because my computer has yet to play the spell check game but the movie in my brain has shown "The End" :) Number 2, my newest baby of literary works is well on it's way....I will wait until it is in the hands of the editor to unveil it's title but am SUPER excited about this one as it Truly pushes the pendulum is so many arenas that the feathers will surely be ruffled beyond a doubt.
Keep a look out!!!

DEEP CARNIVALE

2008-09-26T10:22:00.001-07:00

I AM SCHEDULED TO READ AT 11AM AT THE CUBAN CLUB IN THE CANTINA. MATURE AUDIENCE ONLY FOR THE READING, BUT THE EVENT IS KID FRIENDLY. I WILL BE BRINGING MY 3 AND THEY WILL BE PARTICIPATING IN THE ACTIVITIES THAT HCC HAS PLANNED.

DEEP CARNIVALE IS FROM 10AM-5PM AND IS FREE AND FOR EVERYONE. I WILL BE THERE, COME FIND ME, I WILL HAVE BOOKS FOR PURCHASE AND WILL BE SIGNING.

SEE YA SATURDAY!!

GIVE ME A REVIEW!!!

2008-09-22T13:37:00.000-07:00

This is for my readers who have finished the book. I am in search of everyone's comments and opinions. Everyday I get emails from friends who have finished Malicious Truth and am utterly excited and pleased with the response. This is your chance to praise and also bash the character, lol...no worries, I have my own opinions on the main character, lol.

Thanks and I look forward to everyone's comments.

BOOK LAUNCH RESULTS!!!

2008-09-20T16:41:00.000-07:00

THESE ARE SOME PICTURES FROM MY WONDERFULLY AMAZING BOOK LAUNCH PARTY LAST NIGHT AT THE BUNKER-TRE AMICI. THANK YOU TO EVERYONE CAME OUT TO SHOW YOUR LOVE AND SUPPORT!!!
ENJOY THE PICTURES!!!

MIKE DRIVING US THERE...

JORDAN TOOK A QUICK PICTURE OF ME BEFORE I MESSED UP MY PRETTYFUL SELF, LOL

MY BOOK SIGNING TABLE

JUST WAITING FOR MY FIRST BUYER, LOL THIS WAS 1/2 HOUR BEFORE IT STARTED :)

OH OH OH SIGNING MY FIRST BOOK OF THE NIGHT!!

ME AND MY BEAUTIFUL JOJO

ME AND THE LOVELY MARCIA FREESPIRIT-THE PUBLISHER

THE LOVE OF MY LIFE WITH JOJO

CHEEZIN!!

ARMANDO AND CHRISTINA

TALKING WITH MARCIA TO CHOOSE FROM THE FEW "G" RATED SECTIONS FOR MY READING-SOOOOO NERVOUS AT THIS POINT, LOL

STEAMY STEAMY SEXY READING!!! JK JK JK

ME BEING SILLY...

SOMEONE IN THE CROWD SAID SOMETHING AND THIS IS RIGHT BEFORE I BURSTED OUT LAUGHING..

TALKING WITH DAVID AUDET AND MARCIA FREESPIRIT ABOUT THE NEXT TIME-DEEP CARNIVALE ON SEPTEMBER 27TH AT THE CUBAN CLUB IN YBOR-DAYTIME EVENT-COME CHECK IT OUT!!

SIGNING MORE BOOKS!!

ME WITH JEANNE AND KATIE

MIKE AND ARMANDO

"X" RATED READING-IT WAS AFTER 9PM...ALL THE KITTYS ASLEEP, LOL...THIS WAS HILLARIOUS!

ME WITH Kriscinda...

ME AND THE WOMEN IN MY LIFE-I LOVE EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM!!!JENNIFER,CHRISTINA,JESSICA,JOANN,Kriscinda,JESS MY MESS,DIXIE,ME,MERCY,IDANIA,& MELISSA

ME AND THE GUYS MY BROTHERS ARE RIGHT BESIDE ME AND MY CUZ MARK!!

ME AND MY SISTER-N-LAW CHRISTINE

ME AND MEGAN WITH MOMS FRIENDS

ME HIDING BETWEEN CHRISTINA AND JOANN, AND JENNIFER TRYING TO STAY OUT OF THE PICTURE

CHRISTINE WITH MY TWO BROTHERS, DANNY AND DANTE WITH MY COUSIN MARK...MUAH!!!

ME AND JENNIFER WITH A GUY SHE MET ON THE STREET, JK JK JK

Me and Mercy

ME AND JESSICA

NELSON, DIXIE AND I

NO THIS WAS NOT A DANCERETTE REUNION, BUT STILL...JESSICA,JENNIFER,CHRISTINA,JOANN,ME,MELISSA,MERCY,AND IDANIA

ME AND BY BEAUTIFUL MOTHER-MY HERO!!

ME AND DIXIE-BESOS!!

ME AND CHRISTINA-SHE FINISHED THE BOOK IN A FEW DAYS, LOL...STEAMY STEAMY!!

BOOK LAUNCH UPDATE

2008-09-06T10:43:00.000-07:00

A REMINDER THAT YOU'RE INVITED!!!!

April Gutierrez's Launch of Malicious Truth

When: Friday, September 19, 2008
Time: 7:00 pm - 10:00 pm
Where: Tre Amici @ The Bunker in Ybor City
1907 19th St. N.
Tampa, FL 33605
813-247-6964
www.yborbunker.com

April will be reading from her much anticipated Romance novel -very "G" rated section- throughout the evening.

Complimentary hors d'oeuvres will be served
For more information: Contact@JimSamInc.com or 813-748-9523

or directly with the author at aprilguti@hotmail.com
WE HOPE TO SEE YOU THERE!!!

DEEP CARNIVALE

2008-09-04T15:30:00.000-07:00

Hi Everyone,
I am Super Duper excited!! I have been asked to read from Malicious Truth at the annual Deep Carnivale Festival held in Ybor City on September 27th, 2008 from 10am to 5pm. I will have a table there and will be selling and signing books. I am so Excited about meeting everyone that will be attending and participating. Tell EVERYONE you know and come stop on by!!

Check out the Website for updated information.
http://www.deepcarnivale.com/,

A GOOD CAUSE!!

2008-09-04T15:26:00.000-07:00

08.the3day.org/site/TR/Walk/TampaBayEvent?px=1590832&pg=personal&fr_id=1190&s_tafId=6182

EVERYONE KNOWS SOMEONE THAT IS AFFECTED BY CANCER. PLEASE HELP IN THE BEST WAY YOU CAN!! THIS IS IMPORTANT TO ME AND MY FRIENDS!!!

EVERYONE DESERVES A LIFETIME

Buy the Book from the Publisher

2008-09-04T15:19:00.000-07:00

Hi Everyone,

I've recently gotten news that Malicious Truth is now posted on the publishing Companies website...that link is http://www.jimsaminc.com/, Just search in their Bookstore.
I would prefer everyone to purchase books directly from the publishing company. Thank you again everyone for such wonderful support!!!

BOOK LAUNCH PARTY INFORMATION!!

2008-08-25T13:26:00.000-07:00

Hi everyone, the much anticipated Book Launch Party has been scheduled :)
The event will be Friday, September 19th, 2008 from 7pm-10pm at Tre Amici-The Bunker in ybor City. Soooo excited!!! The address is 1907 19th Street; Tampa Fl 33605-website is www.yborbunker.com. I am very much looking forward to celebrating this amazing journey with all of you and hope to see you there! I will be reading a special section from Malicious Truth so be sure to come Join Us!!!

Over-Whelming Feeling!!!

2008-08-24T18:15:00.000-07:00

Saturday morning started out like any other. Get the kids their breakfast, argue with the cat for chasing and pouncing on the dog and turning on my laptop to get my day started. My house as of late is spotless, so its check the emails, and figure out what is top priority behind the kid's needs. Well...my curious mind has been working overtime in a zillion directions....I have one literature essay paper to fix and one to start writing. Work is crazy but in a good way. Math-uuuggghhhh...I need a tutor because it's all babble to me, I think I understand Savannah's baby talk better than I understand college math. And then there is my writing, which seems to be my vacation spot for my imagination as of late. I am falling in love with my new book and am finding little to no time to dedicate to its grand nature-slowly but surely I catch myself waking up around 11:30 at night to sneak to my laptop to start off where I finished. ANYWAYS, the POINT :) I went on to Amazon cause this curious kitten wanted to see "for shits and giggle" if my book was on yet...mind you I do this every other day since it was sent to the distribution printers:)...And Lol-N-Behold it was ACTUALLY there...I jumped up and down in my living room, snatching the phone off the carrier and calling everyone I knew :) we allll know that I AM and always will be this silly goofball! and I am proud to say that I always will be. WOW....My book is on:

www.Amazon.com
www.BarnsandNobles.com
www.Target.com

about 8 other distribution sites....KEWL!!! Just type in either
"April Gutierrez" or "Malicious Truth"

BUT if you are already on my presale list...The Publishing Company has your copy!!

Needless to say I have had a GREAT weekend Thus FAR!!

JoJo getting her present!!

2008-08-17T08:07:00.000-07:00

WANT TO KNOW WHY SHE WAS CRYING?!?!?!

THIS IS WHAT SHE READ, THE DEDICATION ON THE FIRST PAGE READS...

-> I dedicate my first book to my beautiful Jojo. You are the most blessed daughter and dearest friend any mother could ever hope for. Thank you for always believing in me, loving me for who I am, and for trusting me to be there for you. Happy twenty first birthday my precious child, may you always remember that the bonds of love run deeper than any amount of blood ever running through your heart. Kindred spirits, eternally cherished.

Front & Back of April's First Published Book!

2008-08-11T14:11:00.000-07:00

As I get information from the publishing company, http://www.jimsaminc.com/, on availability I will post it. For now I have a presale list, so if you want a copy, send me an email and I will make sure to reserve you a copy!!

OH and by the way...this book is not a "G" rated novel...it is a "Romance Novel" and all that which is in that definition...As Ive been told it is NOT for those who shy away from sex! Be forewarned :)

The Romance Novel

2008-08-09T14:09:00.000-07:00

Wow, is all I can say. Malicious Truth was originally written as a birthday gift for my step-daughter's 21st birthday, I wanted to give her something that held meaning to her. The child has everything and an abundance of love in her life-which she is without doubt, she knows her father and I adore her and will be there for her through anything no matter what. I also wrote it to prove to her that I can finish something I start. The reasons are still developing in my mind, but honestly it was to prove a point to everyone. I am proud of my accomplishment none the less-to me it is the new great thing since my daughter was born. This book has become a child to me. Watching it develop, then it actually being published, printed and when I finally had it in my hand an overwhelming feeling came about me. OMG! I am an author, a Published Author. Yeah, I'm smiling. So not only am I a mother of 3 small children, step mom to a beautiful 21 year old, fiancee and best friend to a wonderful man, a full time college student, someone who owns her own online home based business, but now, I can safely say that I am an author. I am also writing more than before, the bug bite me and damn enough if my fingers don't go fast enough for the story that is running in my mind. I have started a new novel. Another love story but this one will be less erotic-at least I won't blush as much in it's making as the first. It is also another fictional novel. I am smiling more than I have in a really long time and although nothing is perfect, I think this is the closest I've come to perfection. I know that I have a long road ahead of me in becoming a well rounded author but I am just happy thus far.